Broken people can’t create a whole relationship

I love the quote “broken crayons still color.” In fact, that was one of the few names I had for this blog, until I saw others had it as well. I love this quote because it signifies resilience. Just because you are broken, does not mean you throw in the towel. You are still operational, don’t give up, you can still color. However, in relationships, I would not offer the same sentiment.

Yes, the broken crayons still color, but they are still broken, right? Often people want to enter new relationships as a means to get over the past one, not realizing the hurt, jealousy, insecurities they still harbor. Ever heard the saying “the best way to get over someone is to get under another one?” Dumbest advice ever! We expect the next person coming along to deal with the emotions, pick up the broken pieces, mend them, and prove that they are not your ex……But Why? Why bring your baggage into a new situiationship (yes, I said that) and expect us to prove ourselves, and deal with insecurities that have nothing to do with us? It is not fair, and actually, the relationship is starting off all wrong.

Here’s an idea: heal yourself, don’t expect someone else to do it. Don’t let the new person bear the load and emotional strain that occurred before him/her? Take your time, work on yourself, not to just be better for someone else, but for a better you as well. Don’t be the broken crayon still trying to color, be the refurbished one that has been through some things, was fixed, and can color as good as before.

Published by KSaloneCoach

Kasey is a Relationship Coach that specializes in couples who struggle with communication, intimacy and boundaries in their relationships. With a Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy, she has learned how to work with complex systems and understand the profound effect of collaboration. Kasey has helped hundreds of people work through their challenges, and enhance their relationships. Not just through her education, but as a United States Navy Veteran, Kasey has traveled the world and experienced first hand the various ways that love is communicated. Also through her military service, Kasey learned the core values of honor, courage and commitment, and has applied it to her businesses and relationships. She believes that the client is the expert on their own lives and success is the result of client willingness and the relationship with the coach. Her goal is to create loving, lasting and cohesive relationships-no matter where you are in your journey. Kasey and her husband, a 21 year servicember the United States Navy, have been married for 12 years, have 3 children, a dog, and tons of memories from their various duty stations. Kasey’s new podcast A Melanated Mess, will be available in July. Also she has written for Queens Uniting, a non profit organization and Military Spouse Behavioral Health Clinicians (MSBHC). You can find Kasey on Instagram and Facebook @ksalonecoach. She recently completed her first relationship e-workbook, 5 Senses of Love, which is available on her website www.ksalone.com.

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